How To Stop Worrying About What Others Think

Pleasing everyone is impossible, especially if we want to maintain good emotional health. Worrying excessively about what others think can be a great psychological drain. In addition, by continually looking to please everyone, we abandon ourselves.

In fact, it is a very common way to stop living in the present moment and to betray ourselves.  Because in the end, who are we really? It is as if we have sold ourselves to others, as if our opinions and thoughts are not valid if they are not approved by others.

Now, there is nothing more seductive than a person who is totally in tune with himself and who lives life as he would like. Or not? So why not show ourselves as we are and allow others to get to know us for it, instead of pretending to be who we are not?

Characteristics of a person who cares about what others think

If you are one of those who spends a lot of time thinking about giving an image to be accepted by others, surely you carry out one of these behaviors:

• You stop being yourself and you are who others want you to be.
• You stay away from others so they don’t judge you.
• You are constantly aware of whether your actions will be accepted or not.
• You maintain a constant state of alertness that is exhausting.
• If something doesn’t go as planned, you feel really bad.
• You forget about yourself to think of others.
• You save your emotions by thinking about whether they will be accepted or not.
• You do not show yourself how you are, but how they want you to be.

• You have a shield since it prevents your relationships from being authentic and that ends up wearing you out.

These are some of the many problems derived from being overly concerned with what others think. As you can see, trying to please everyone is exhausting, especially since you end up canceling yourself and pretending to be who you are not. 

How to stop worrying about what others think

If you spend a lot of time fearing the opinion of others to the point that you run out of time for yourself, follow the tips below. They are sure to help you.

1. Understand the reasons for your concern

Understanding that culture and socialization are important to our social belonging is the first step to stop thinking this way. From childhood they teach us to act in a certain way, to dress in a specific way, to accept certain ideologies, to buy fashion products, etc.

In addition, the emergence of social networks favors that we are constantly exposed to a showcase of social comparison. Therefore, we must reflect on what is happening around us. This is very important to recover our identity as subjects and not as objects.

It is exhausting to constantly monitor the image that we show to the outside, and even more so when we have to be aware of what we publish on our Facebook, Instagram, etc. profiles.

2. You cannot control the opinion of others

Each person is a world, with their experiences, their thoughts, their tastes, etc. Therefore, it is impossible to please everyone because you cannot fit within everyone’s parameters.

Focusing on others instead of yourself is a mistake, since you have no control over what they think or say about you. What you can control is the path you want to follow and what you are going to take with you.

3. Don’t waste your energy on pleasing others

As we have discussed, worrying about what others think of you is exhausting, because you waste your energy on something that you do not control. Instead, spend that time thinking about yourself and you are sure to get better results.

4. Practice mindfulness

The mindfulness philosophy  refers to living the present in its entirety and proposes that on this path we are able, progressively, to find the essence of who we are.

Thanks to this practice we become aware of the reality that surrounds us and we can live from freedom, self- knowledge and acceptance. In addition, from the mindfulness mentality , it does not make much sense what others think of ourselves, because we respect ourselves as we are.