Cultivating The Sense Of Self, A Path Towards Us

Sometimes we become so preoccupied with our outer world that we are not aware of our existence. How to be? How to flourish in our relationship with others, without neglecting our authentic self? Cultivating a sense of self is a path that can lead us to it.

In this article we will address the beliefs, representations, perceptions, images, determinations, and values, among other issues, associated with a person. We will immerse ourselves in the world of the self and explore the possibilities that cultivating it gives us.

To begin we will approach the definition of the self. Later, we will talk about the authentic self and address some tips to connect with our most genuine side. In addition, we will show you how to cultivate our sense of self in a holistic way.

What is the sense of self?

The sense of self has been a concept approached by different disciplines, such as psychology and philosophy. Its exact meaning is still under discussion, but what we know today is that it is a multidimensional concept. The self is made up of the physical, the social, the mental, the personal, and the familiar.

The word self translates to me or self. However, the approaches to this concept are diverse depending on the branch of psychology. Let’s see:

• Social psychology. It consists of a construction that the person makes that originates from their interactions with others. In fact, Pablo Páramo, in his publication in the  Latin American Journal of Psychology, shows us how the sense of self is the product of the individual’s transactions with their social and psychological environments; that is to say, that identity and the self would emerge through cultural and social elements.

• Psychoanalysis. It is an organizer of memories of the person, the consciousness of the mind and of reality, and the different images of oneself. This concept changes according to the author, since it is usually differentiated between itself real, idealized and current.
• Humanism. It is associated with a process of self-realization that drives action.
• Comprehensive psychology. It is a whole integrated by the biological, environmental, behavioral, cognitive, emotional and consciousness systems that has to do with the personality. In addition, the meaning that the person gives to each experience is included here.

Also, the sense of self is linked to the level of consciousness that we have about ourselves, together with our ability to integrate various cognitive, emotional, social, physical processes, etc. On the other hand, by being aware of who we are, we build our identity; through the sense of self we process and organize it, while we express it through our personality.

The sense of authentic self

To enhance a sense of authentic self, it is necessary to intervene in all areas of our development. But the essential first step is to undertake a journey into the depths of our being. The idea is that we meet there and know how we are in each of the areas in which we operate. Also, understand what our goals are.

It is about connecting with who we are and being in tune with it. So it is essential to recognize and accept our limitations, to work on our irrational beliefs and to show ourselves without masks.

On the other hand, it is essential to work on our consciousness, since each time we can go further. The idea is to seize the present moment, find ourselves and let ourselves flow. To do this, we must be flexible and attend to each of the fields of our development.

How to cultivate our sense of self?

Developing a strong sense of self will help us to find our own voice, to be more authentic and to promote our integral well-being. This is not an impossible matter. Let’s see how we can cultivate our sense of self:

• Let’s differentiate ourselves. It is about distinguishing ourselves from our environment by being more aware. This also means making decisions that are in tune with who we are. To do this, we need to set limits, in addition to taking our time.
• Reflect. It is essential to have a conversation with us to explore new ways of being who we are and where we want to go. It is about observing and negotiating with us by emphasizing our feelings, thoughts, and interactions.

• Emphasizing our automatic responses is about listening to our decisions. To do this, we need to take time, sometimes we act from automatism and we are not in tune with our sense of authentic self.
• Challenges? Rather, opportunities! When we face difficult situations in life we ​​can see them as an opportunity to decide who we are and what we are capable of doing.
• Act. It is not only about thinking and feeling according to our authentic self, we can also perform actions that are in tune with it.

The sense of self can be authentic, but we can also have an ideal sense of self. According to Rollo May, a pioneer of existentialist psychology, it has to do with that self that we yearn to be and to which we assign a higher value. When our sense of the real self differs from the ideal, we become dissatisfied.

In short, the sense of self can be cultivated; the closer it is to the genuine, the healthier. To achieve its highest potential we must be vigilant in all of our fields of development. Consciousness and self-knowledge help us on this path, two wonderful tools to find ourselves.