5 Reasons Why A Psychotherapy Can Fail
A psychotherapy fails for different reasons, but that failure is always relative. The mere fact of having started the process is already a step forward. The same willingness to improve and the interest to do so denote self-love and the will to be better.
It is not easy to make the decision to expose your entire inner world to a person you do not know. You know he is a professional, but that does not eliminate the fact that all, or at least most, need a minimum degree of trust or affinity to share our feelings. If we seek a psychotherapist, we do so because we feel we need help. But sometimes, “something” just happens and we can’t make that process successful.
Regardless of the reason psychotherapy fails, it should always be tried again. In the world of the human, nothing works perfectly. The most important thing, in any case, is our decision to be better. And it is always good to keep in mind what are the main reasons why a psychotherapy fails. This can help us prevent it from happening. These are five of them.
1. Lack of commitment
The main protagonist in psychological therapy is the one who in some approaches is called “patient” and in others “analysand” or “client”. No matter what kind of school it is, in all cases the person who goes to psychotherapy must have a basic commitment . That commitment is, above all, with himself.
It is reflected with punctual attendance at sessions and with doing everything possible on your part to overcome their problems. Wanting, with honesty, to find the reasons and the ways that lead you to overcome your difficulties. Unfortunately, this is not always the case.
2. Too much is expected of the psychotherapist
One of the most frequent reasons why psychotherapy fails is too high an expectation of the therapist. There are those who expect from him all the answers to their difficulties. Nothing more wrong than this.
The psychotherapist is not a magician, nor a sage, nor a seer. Nor is he a guide, strictly speaking. Their role is to accompany and frame the process that allows a person to get to know each other better. He is trained to help those who consult him, the objective is for him to interpret in a more objective or intelligent way what happens to him. Strictly, it does not have the power to change anyone’s life.
3. The resistances are very strong
It is usual that we tend to get attached to our problems and also to the wrong ways of solving them. Every problem, no matter how serious, has secondary benefits. For example, victimization helps to justify inaction or lack of decision to change your life. That is why we always have a hard time letting go of our problems.
This is called “resistance.” In most cases it is an unconscious or pre-conscious reality. Resistance leads, for example, to abandoning sessions when high points are reached. Psychotherapy often fails because whoever comes to it cannot overcome these resistance to change.
4. If there are wrong motivations, psychotherapy fails
The therapeutic space allows us to review the way we think, feel or act. The objective is to identify the factors that generate the discomfort that leads us to consultation. Also identify other ways to approach our personal reality, to build a more fulfilling and satisfying life.
However, people do not always consult motivated by these purposes. Sometimes they do it because they want to solve a specific problem. They do not want to explore within themselves, but to find the formula to solve an impasse. For example, they want their partner to change and they go to consultation to be told how to achieve it. A psychotherapy fails if it starts from a motivation of this type.
5. Bad relationship with the psychotherapist
The relationship established in psychotherapy is a professional one. However, this does not eliminate the fact that it is a link between two human beings. As such, there is no guarantee that there is what we call “chemistry” or a good “feeling.” Psychotherapy sometimes fails because of this factor.
A good psychotherapy is a gift that every person should give themselves sometime. It is not something that will solve all your problems or guarantee happiness. No one is guaranteed. However, it is a space that allows rethinking and renewal. Do a cleaning in our inner world and put some things in order. Even if it fails, it always leaves some input.
